I especially align with this: " If someone else tries to impose their rules onto me there is something in my nature that feels a visceral sense of being coerced and crushed whenever I’ve been told what to do."
In sport and games, we need obviously "rules". Personally, I'm not a great fan of the concept in working life or personal life. I prefer agreements, which all those involved, reach.
Associations: rules and rulers - Who has the right to "rule" over me? Nobody, I say.
New Year's Resolutions - never done them. Never seen the point. When it feels like the right/appropriate time to start something, then that's the time to start, be it 1st January, 23rd April, 17th August or whenever.
I find I don't have to set positive ("do this") rules for myself if what I need to do aligns with my intentions- like you, I just do it. I do have to set negative rules for myself to overcome a tendency to overdo what I enjoy... 🤣🤣
I have never been willing to follow rules set by others unless they are justified to my satisfaction. I do remember reading "What Katy Did" as a child, and being angry that no-one had explained the dangers to her; "because I say so" has always provoked defiance in me.
Thanks for your thought-provoking posts, and Happy New Year!
I think the urge to control others is rooted in people's insecurities, but there is always a backfire effect - even when we try too hard to control ourselves - it backfires and the actual behaviour is opposite to what we wanted.
Happy new year to you Katy, and thanks for engaging with my writing - it means a lot.
Very nice post John.
I especially align with this: " If someone else tries to impose their rules onto me there is something in my nature that feels a visceral sense of being coerced and crushed whenever I’ve been told what to do."
In sport and games, we need obviously "rules". Personally, I'm not a great fan of the concept in working life or personal life. I prefer agreements, which all those involved, reach.
Associations: rules and rulers - Who has the right to "rule" over me? Nobody, I say.
New Year's Resolutions - never done them. Never seen the point. When it feels like the right/appropriate time to start something, then that's the time to start, be it 1st January, 23rd April, 17th August or whenever.
Wishing you a good start to the year.
I find I don't have to set positive ("do this") rules for myself if what I need to do aligns with my intentions- like you, I just do it. I do have to set negative rules for myself to overcome a tendency to overdo what I enjoy... 🤣🤣
I have never been willing to follow rules set by others unless they are justified to my satisfaction. I do remember reading "What Katy Did" as a child, and being angry that no-one had explained the dangers to her; "because I say so" has always provoked defiance in me.
Thanks for your thought-provoking posts, and Happy New Year!
Katy
I think the urge to control others is rooted in people's insecurities, but there is always a backfire effect - even when we try too hard to control ourselves - it backfires and the actual behaviour is opposite to what we wanted.
Happy new year to you Katy, and thanks for engaging with my writing - it means a lot.
Happy 2024 to you as well!
Looking forward to whatever emerges from our conversations Brian, let's make 2024 a good one.